Release.

To let go of it all.

To be free of the chains that encumber your movement.

To be rid of the shackles that tie your thoughts together, forcing them to remain tethered to your being. 

What some find in numbing the senses and distracting their minds from their torturous selves.

While others find in ripping open their flesh and watching the purgation of sin. 

The lack of which pushes you to find solace in others. 

Which further pushes you into the giant pit of despair you wish to crawl out of. 

Release. 

Not to be mocked or undermined. 

Not to be disregarded. 

It is not, as many believe, a practice confined to the weak.

The strongest find themselves clutching at it, masking their true intentions from themselves.

Release. 

A complete surrender.

Temporary, but perfect, liberation. 

Release.

Break.

When you realize the exact moment everything fell apart, but you don't know why, not for sure.
So you spend hours wondering and analyzing, hoping that somehow you will figure it out and know.
You replay the last few days and try to deconstruct the various interactions you had. The uneasiness and awkwardness, the forced conversation. You can pinpoint the last day that things had some semblance of normalcy. You have the texts messages that prove that things were still okay.
And then there was a break.
A loud crack and everything just broke.
You didn't notice it then.
But now you do.
It was your choice, you are the one who took the first punch.
The fault lines were already showing.
The break was clean and easy.
No harm, no foul.
Everyone goes on living.
You want to make it clear that there is no resentment.
That you just couldn't be a part of it anymore.
That you still care.
You will always care.
Caring doesn't go away.
But it's too late now.
You don't know how they will respond.
You don't want confrontation or rejection.
So go back to wondering.
Analyzing.
This is how it is going to be.
This is what is best for you.
To be alone.
To stay away.
They are better off without you anyway.
It is done.
Set in stone.
Finished.
Over.
The End.
It was a beautiful chapter in a not so beautiful book.
Turn the page.
Figure out your next step.
You are the enemy in their story, don't be one in yours.
Accept yourself.
It is all going to be okay.